Sep 23, 2014

Note To Self

Dear Erin,

In case you have forgotten, you are no longer 13 years old and used to playing multiple softball games in one day. I mean, you struggled to make it through 5 games while in your prime, so why would you expect to make it through 6 at your age? Here are a couple things to keep in mind should you decide to do this again. And you probably will because you had a freaking blast out there on Saturday.

-  It is 110%-absolutely-no ifs ands or buts about it-required that you stretch before any sporting event now. Softball or volleyball. 1 game or 5 games. Stretch every single muscle possible. And when you think you've stretched enough, give everything another quick round. Don't forget that muscle between your thumb and the rest of your hand. Those are pretty sore still from having to catch softballs flying at you.

-  Please don't slide anymore. Especially if you're wearing shorts, a t-shirt and ankle socks. You got up with minimal scratches and a bruise on your boob, which is really impressive given your gracefulness. And when I say gracefulness, I mean you practically fell on top of the bag. Your husband even made fun of you. Again, you couldn't slide when you actually played softball so why would you now at 25?

- Pack a cooler and fill it with twice as much water as you do beer. You were the only one on your team that pee'd more than one time between 11am-8pm. Don't forget snacks too. You were borderline hangry at one point and that's no fun for anybody.

- If you happen to be breastfeeding at the time, for God's sake wear breast pads. You almost had embarrassing leakage problems and you were wearing a red shirt that was very worn and milk would have been very noticeable. And try to time your pumps a little better.

- Finally, the next time an opportunity like this arises, you will absolutely participate and don't even try to talk yourself out of it!

No comments:

Post a Comment